Ding.
Joselyn: COLETTE. WHERE ARE YOU? I’M AT THE BAKE SHOP AND I NEED YOUR FACE.
Colette: I'm at home. My face is on my couch. It's currently being steamed by puppy hair.
Joselyn: NO. REAL FACE. I booked you for a livestream collab with that influencer who eats everything in one bite. YOU PROMISED.
Colette: I did not promise to be chewed. I promised to be charming. Different commitment.
Joselyn: Charming isn't going to sell croissants, babe. Show up or I show up at your apartment and drag you.
Colette: That is a felony.
Joselyn: I'm kidding. Fine. Show up tomorrow 10:00. Be awake. Don't do anything romantic with the pastries.
Colette: I can't promise anything about the pastries.
Friend2 (Ava): Send coffee. You two are impossible.
Colette: Sending. *links a GIF of a sloth clinging to a coffee mug*
Joselyn: Also, stop creeping on that doctor you met on the subway. Delete his number. Move on.
Colette: I am not creeping. I am curating a potential love story arc.
Joselyn: Translation: you stared, smiled, then almost tripped.
Colette: Almost tripped is called being graceful with momentum.
Friend2: You were embarrassed when he got off three stops early.
Colette: Strategic exit. Keeps him curious.
Silence hung in the group chat for three seconds. That felt like forever.
Colette: Guys, stop. You're brutal.
A new message thread opened itself with a photo-sized avatar: a man in scrubs, half-smile, city skyline behind