"Aurora, your mother wanted one thing—go study. Come with us."
"I promised her," I said, kneeling on the cold soil. My hands left a clean print on the grave marker.
Maki crouched beside me. "She packed your bag for you. She left a list. She said you'd argue if she stayed long enough."
"She always lied about the list," I said. "She said I needed more shoes."
Maki put a hand on my shoulder. Her fingers were warm. "She wanted you to have choices."
"I don't want choices," I heard myself say. "I want her back."
"You won't get her back," Maki said. "You can keep her with you. Or you can let her go."
"How?" I asked.
"By moving," she said. "By doing what she wanted."
Silence settled between us. Not the dramatic silence books use. Just the kind that meant nothing else would be said for a moment.
"I promised her I would keep living," I said finally. "I promise that now. I will study. I will finish school."
"You'll finish Summit High," Maki corrected, smiling once. "Your mother would be proud."
"I will do it for her," I said. The words were narrow. They fit. They felt like duty, not relief.
"You don't have to pretend for me," Maki said. "I know you miss her."
"I know," I answered. I kissed the edge of the headstone because my hands needed something to do. Dirt stuck to my lips. I didn't